Home > Uncategorized > So They’re Making Human-Hunting Robot Cheetah Terminators Now

So They’re Making Human-Hunting Robot Cheetah Terminators Now

And I for one welcome our murderous cheetah overlords.

This isn’t a joke. This is a thing that is actually happening.

Geekologie is one of my favorite sites, since they post interesting gadget related news with a humorous editorial voice. The Geekologie writer has a horrible fear of robots that comes through in every robotics related post and, after seeing that article, I sort of sympathize.

The Cheetah bot will be able not only to run faster than the fastest human on earth, but can also zigzag and evade. I find it amusing that the company behind it, Boston Dynamics, lists one of the applications of the robot is “advanced agriculture”. Because, you know, I imagine retractable flesh shredding claws come in handy when harvesting eggplant.

The article says the Cheetah will be able to “chase and evade” and will be able to “stop on a dime.” So really the only way you could make this robot sound scarier is if it turned out its fuel cells ran on gore and FEAR.

If that didn’t sound ominous enough, if you read the original article the Geekologie post references, it turns out these same guys are also working on building a HEADLESS TERMINATOR.

"Your life as it has been is over. From this time forward, you will service... us"

I am honestly glad that Boston Dynamics is on our side and everything, but holy crap, they build scary stuff. I really hope they don’t have a mad scientist working for them who will ultimately usurp control of their robots and lead an invasion force. Because the last thing I want to wake up to is a robotic cheetah shredding my torso apart with its rotating saw blade teeth, while its headless terminator handler rips my head from my spinal column for its human head collection. I like holding on to both my head and torso.

Again, I’m sure Boston Dynamics is full of responsible individuals who know what they’re doing (and certainly wouldn’t send robotic death cheetah squads on innocent blog writers who were totally only kidding before).  Still… it might be a good idea to lay low for a few decades, in case these guys decide to build AM from I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream next.

  1. JTDrift
    April 17, 2011 at 8:59 pm

    … O_O

    but why a cheetah? why not start small like with a kitten, or a mouse? Maybe they can challenge themselves by making an improved Furby that doesn’t get on your nerves after 25mins?

    • Alice
      April 18, 2011 at 2:48 am

      It’s because it’s easier to build human size than to build kitten size. There’s more room for error.

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